The last two months

Well.... a lot's happened. Possibly the biggest thing that has happened is the fact that me and Will are no longer together. We never went on that date - possibly because I realised that he just wasn't 'the one'. He's too ruthless for me. Which sounds really brutal, but I don't know how else to put it. He's one of those people who drops anybody he's bored with and moves on.

When we went into London for a theatre trip with school, we got the same train there and back, and he was telling me how he managed to get one person (coincidently, it was my ex) to leave the school because he bullied him so much. He told me how he successfully managed to get one girl to not be friends with his friends. That attitude blew it for me. Any chance we had together now doesn't exist, because I don't want to be his new target. I don't want a boyfriend who chooses other people's friends. I don't want a boyfriend who makes a mess of things, drops it, moves on and leaves someone else to pick up the pieces. Sorry. He's obviously not the boyfriend I'm looking for.

So that's that. We still talk, and we're on friendly terms, but when he inevitably drops me like he has so many others, it won't hurt quite as much if we're simply friends, than if we're in a full-on relationship.

I can't remember if I mentioned me being in the school play, but I was, and that went brilliantly. I had (even the directors said so) the most lines and the most challenging character, and possibly the most prompts too, but the number of prompts I had don't compare to the fantastic experience it was. I want to do it all over again, and I'll probably cry a little when the audition posters go up next year and I realise I won't be able to be in it. I keep telling myself 'it'll be nice to be able to go into the auditorium next year and not know what to expect', but for me, the knowing and keeping it secret and performing it is so much more fun and memorable than simply watching it.

The Bassoon's progressing.... I gave up on the oboe, because I kept getting dizzy - too much air pressure on the brain, I guess.

Mum now officially knows that I'm at least spending my gap year with my brother in London somewhere - neither of us know whereabouts in London yet, but that's where we'll be. She also knows that I'm considering studying in England too. I know last time I was on the topic of University, I moaned about the £9,000pa not being worth it, but we've had plenty of talks on student finance, and I'm not too fussed about it any more - I wouldn't consider it a debt anyway, if the money comes out of my account automatically and I never see the money I owe in the first place, then I never think about having to repay the money, so that's all good. I'm looking at a Joint Honours in Music and Film Studies, which all looks very exciting.

Hmmmm what else? Apart from meeting David Tennant and Catherine Tate at the signing after Much Ado About Nothing (I have the script they used and they've touched it, and signed it and I'm like OMG!!!!!!! :D:D), nothing new or of any interest.

xx